1. When talking to someone, hold the person’s face with both hands.
2. Sniffle incessantly.
3. Cough every time one begins to talk.
4. Name your dog “Dog.”
5. Ask 911 operators out on a date.
6. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what YOU think.”
7. Reply to everything your male friends say with “that’s what SHE said.”
8. Begin all your sentences with “ooh la la!”
9. Make appointments one year ahead.
10. Invite lots of people to other people’s parties.
11. Drum on every accessible surface.
12. Hop on your way to anywhere.
13. Go to the library and read a book as loud as you can.
14. Set alarms every 30 minutes or at random times.
15. Ask a person “Are you real?” and pinch his face.
16. Ask people if they’re still a virgin.
17. Ask a person about the time and tell them they’re lying.
18. Pour a bottle of cologne to your shirt and make people sniff you.
19. Whisper “the end is near” to every passerby.
20. Borrow a pen. Chew the end. Give back right away.
21. Shout “I know what’s going to happen next” at the movie theater.
22. Challenge a stranger to a staring contest.
23. Pay your bills with pennies.
24. Draw eyebrows on every neighbor’s dog.
25. Bark at every cat you see.
26. Call a random number and ask why he or she called.